Key events
17th over: New Zealand 66-1 (Young 30, Williamson 16) Stokes tries a very full inswinger to Williamson, who chips it confidently over short extra for four. It wasn’t a million miles from the fielder but Williamson had it under control.
New Zealand lead by 270.
16th over: New Zealand 59-1 (Young 29, Williamson 10) The moment I type that about England looking good in the field, Young gets a couple of overthrows when nobody backs up Bethell’s throw.
Oof. The last ball of Carse’s third over is a malevolent lifter that hits Williamson on the bottom glove. If Carse gets one he could run through the middle order, just as Will O’Rourke did earlier in the day. First, it’s time for drinks.
15th over: New Zealand 55-1 (Young 26, Williamson 9) England were sloppy with the bat but their attitude in the field has been good; if you descended from Mars you’d think the game was in the balance.
But it’s not, because New Zealand are already 259 runs ahead. Young takes Stokes for a couple of boundaries, a tickle to fine leg and an excellent drive through mid-off.
14th over: New Zealand 47-1 (Young 18, Williamson 9) By his standards, Carse was a bit loose in the first innings. He has started well today, nailing his length, and on this pitch he has the tools to make life really uncomfortable. Williamson is beaten by a lovely delivery, then grimaces slightly after being pinned by a nipbacker. An excellent maiden over.
13th over: New Zealand 47-1 (Young 18, Williamson 9) I thought Shoaib Bashir might be used as second change but Ben Stokes has brought himself on to replace Potts. A canny wide yorker is squeezed past leg stump by Young, who has slowed down after a fast start to the innings: 15 from 21 balls then 3 from the next 15.
12th over: New Zealand 45-1 (Young 17, Williamson 8) Brydon Carse replaces Gus Atkinson, who bowled a useful spell of 5-2-10-1. Young survives a run-out chance when Stokes’ oddly ungainly throw from extra cover misses the stumps. That’s all there is to report.
Meanwhile, in Brisbane, Travis Head is once again being Travis Head. If you haven’t read it there’s a quite brilliant interview with Head in this month’s Wisden Cricket Monthly; I can’t remember the last time I read or heard a current great go into such detail about their batting.
11th over: New Zealand 44-1 (Young 16, Williamson 8) The wicket allows Potts to resume his intriguing battle with Kane Williamson, who he dismissed for the fourth time in the first innings.
He threatens to make it five when Williamson edges through the slips for four to get off the mark. The way Williamson snapped his head round suggested he was worried about being caught, but in fact his Fairy Liquid hands dropped the ball well short of the diving Brook.
A classy and entirely deliberate late cut brings Williamson four more to the same part of the ground.
10th over: New Zealand 35-1 (Young 15, Williamson 0) Latham ends the series with 171 runs at 28.50, which is below par but not too bad in what has been a lowish-scoring series. So far only Harry Brook and Kane Williamson have reached 200 runs.
WICKET! New Zealand 35-1 (Latham b Atkinson 19)
Latham drags a shortish delivery from Atkinson back onto the stumps to end a promising but all too brief innings of 19. The fightback starts here.
9th over: New Zealand 31-0 (Latham 15, Young 15) For some reason the internet seems to get haywire at around 3.45am, so I’ve spent the last five minutes trying to fix it. You didn’t miss much, just another maiden from Potts. England have established some control with the ball, which is good, although a deficit of 235 is a bridge that’ll need crossing at some stage.
8th over: New Zealand 31-0 (Latham 15, Young 15)
7th over: New Zealand 29-0 (Latham 13, Young 15) Latham thick edges Potts through the cordon for four. Potts hits his knees after slipping in his delivery stride, a cheap and easy visual metaphor for England’s position in this match.
Potts’ dumb luck continues when another edge from Latham drops short of second slip and scuttles under Root for two more runs. New Zealand lead by 233.
6th over: New Zealand 18-0 (Latham 5, Young 12) You have to feel for Potts and Atkinson, who bowled those weird statemate overs this morning and are now back at the altar of hard yakka after only 35.4 overs. Given the turn that Santner found, Shoaib Bashir is likely to do a lot of work in this innings.
For now the seamers are bowling pretty well and Atkinson has just made it three consecutive maidens.
5th over: New Zealand 18-0 (Latham 5, Young 12) Another maiden, this time from Potts to Latham, including an edge that bounces short of second slip.
4th over: New Zealand 18-0 (Latham 5, Young 12) That’s a good over from Atkinson, the first maiden of the innings.
“I’m pleased to say I slept through the entire England innings,” says Kim Thonger. “By no means the first time it’s happened. I think I can solve the No3 problem. The management need to hire Paul McKenna as team hypnotist to take Pope to one side at the start of each innings and hypnotise him into believing he’s batting at 6. They’ve tried wackier ideas.”
Fun fact: Paul McKenna played a key role in Robin Smith’s recovery after Ian Bishop broke his cheekbone in 1995. For the only time in his career, The Judge found himself flinching against the short ball. McKenna put him under and he was fine for the tour of South Africa that winter.
REVIEW! New Zealand 18-0 (Young not out 12)
Will Young reviews successfully after being given out LBW. He played around his front pad at a lovely nipbacker from Atkinson that hit him on the kneeroll. I thought it was out, Young thought it was missing leg stump. Guess who was right.
3rd over: New Zealand 18-0 (Latham 5, Young 12) Young smokes a pull for four off Potts, a statement of dominance as well as a fine shot in itself. The lead is already 222.
2nd over: New Zealand 13-0 (Latham 5, Young 7) Latham drives Atkinson sweetly through mid-on for four, holding the pose at the end of his follow through. England pulled off some amazing comebacks in the first summer of Bazball, most notably at Edgbaston when India were effectively 285 for 3 in their second innings and were still hammered by seven wickets. Here, in truth, they look a beaten team.
“I am in Hamilton, having been to Christchurch and Wellington, as well as five Tests in India and three in Pakistan this year,” write Neil Waterfield. “I am ready to go home. I was ready after Wellington. If the players have five per cent of that sentiment (even subconsciously), it could explain the performance? An explanation, not an excuse.”
Oh absolutely. It’s not ideal but they’re human beings and we all know what that means: imperbloodyfection. This is England’s 17th Test of the year; I think only India in 1983 have played more. They don’t get a free pass but they do deserve plenty of empathy.
1st over: New Zealand 9-0 (Latham 1, Young 7) Not a great start from England, with Young getting four thanks to a misjudgement by the sliding Bashir at fine leg. Potts then has a big LBW appeal against Latham turned down; Ben Stokes isn’t interested in a review.
“Now…” says Paul Cockburn. “Go back in time and use the benefit of hindsight. Should Santner have played from the start?”
That’s a ticklishly good question, especially at 3.10am. My instinct is no, because the pitches in the first two games did plenty for the seamers and Nathan Smith could easily have had a debut five-for. Then again, England can’t score a run against spin at the moment.
New Zealand are batting again. They will effectively start their innings on 204 for 0; Matt Potts is about to bowl to Tom Latham.
“Hi Rob,” says Brian Withington. “Can the OBO propose that either side should be able to enforce the follow-on? Seconded.
“PS Tell Tom that daytime life is overrated.”
“Just as the England football team has a glut of right backs and barely any on the left, do the cricket boys have a load of middle order batters yet no natural No3?” wonders Max Williams. “Pope clearly more comfortable down the order. And is this a byproduct of the Bazball mentality? Seems unlikely Jonathan Trott would excel in this team – although he probably wouldn’t have been picked in the first place.”
It predates Stokes and McCullum so I’m not sure it’s a byproduct of their approach. The last natural, vaguely successful No3 was Joe Denly; before that it’s probably Gary Ballance before he was found out. I know some of the Wisden Cricket Monthly would have Jamie Smith at No3, or even opening, with with Pope taking the gloves at No6. Smith definitely has the technique and gearstick needed to bat No3, but it would involve a lot of tinkering and you just never know how anyone will deal with the pressure of such a pivotal position. History will be kind to Pope I reckon.
“Spoiled for choice here in North Carolina,” writes Chris Pockney. “Hopping back and forth between this match and the Gabba. Gladiator just came on the TV and as I made an early start on the Christmas port, Maximus uttered the immortal words ‘on my command unleash hell’ and Bumrah ran in to bowl. The simulation just trolling us!”
Tea
New Zealand lead by 204 runs and can enforce the follow on if they want to. It’s hard to see that happening. Matt Henry finishes with 4 for 48 and Mitchell Santner 3 for 7 – but the real star was Will O’Rourke, who flattened England’s celebrated middle order in a spell of nasty, ruthless but also intelligent fast bowling. O’Rourke’s figures of 8-2-33-3, though excellent, don’t convey just how good he was.
WICKET! England 143 all out (Potts c Phillips b Henry 1)
Tea’s up! Potts slices Henry high in the air on the off side, and Phillips runs back from point to take a beautifully judged catch.
35th over: England 143-9 (Potts 1, Bashir 1) The ball has turned for Santner, particularly the one that got Pope, but really this has been another end-of-term batting performance from England. Ben Stokes’ 43-ball stay is the longest of the innings; even Will O’Rourke survived 30 balls this morning.
With England nine down, the tea break will be delayed until the end of the innings. I don’t think anyone will be feeling any hunger pangs.
WICKET! England 141-9 (Carse ct and b Santner 1)
Bump ball my derriere: Carse’s bat scuffed the ground but he chipped the ball straight back to Santner! This is crazy: Mitch Santner has taken 3 for 5!
Carse gives a simple return catch to Santner, but nobody is sure whether it was a bump ball or not. The third umpire will reveal all any second now.
34th over: England 141-8 (Atkinson 1, Carse 0) England aren’t actually past the follow-on target yet, though I can’t see New Zealand enforcing it. England need to reach 148 to take it off the table.
“Recovered from the wisdom tooth pain, but my sleep pattern has been destroyed by so much great overnight cricket…” says Tom Bancroft. “Need to get a grip… Daytime life is falling apart.”
Tell me about it. I was talking to Yas Rana (host of the brilliant series of Wisden podcasts) about this the other day, trying to work out the best system. I’ve had no routine at all, just sleeping and waking and eating like an oaf. It’s been a slog.
WICKET! England 141-8 (Atkinson c Santner b Henry 4)
England are having a bit of a stinker I’m afraid. Atkinson chips Henry tamely to mid-on, where Santner staggers in to take a deceptively good low catch. Runs, wickets and now a catch: Santner’s selection could barely have gone any better.
33rd over: England 137-7 (Atkinson 1, Carse 0) Santner has a huge LBW appeal against Carse turned down on height. The umpire Ahsan Raza thought about that for quite a while but I think he made the right decision.
Before that Pune Test, Santner had taken 54 Test wickets at an average of 42, spread across nine years of red-ball anonymity. Since then – and yes I know it’s an extremely small sample size but it’s my sample size and I’ll do with as I please – he’s picked up 15 more at 11 apiece. Nobody saw that coming, not even Quasimodo.
WICKET! England 137-7 (Stokes LBW b Santner 27)
Another wicket for Mitchellitharan! Stokes launches into a lusty sweep, misses and is hit just below the knee roll. That’s plumb. He reviews just in case the technology has a funny turn; it doesn’t. Three reds and Stokes has gone.
32nd over: England 137-6 (Stokes 27, Atkinson 1) Three singles from Henry’s over, one of which leads to a precautionary referral against Stokes. He’s fine.
“Oh yes, we’re here all right,” says John Starbuck. “Keep going, despite the lack of witty repartee.”
I’m doing my best John!
31st over: England 134-6 (Stokes 25, Atkinson 0) New Zealand lead by 213 runs. That, I’m here to tell you, is a lot of runs.
WICKET! England 134-6 (Pope c Mitchell b Santner 24)
After 127.1 overs, it’s time for the first spin of the match (unless you count Matt Potts’ back-of-the-hand slower ball). Mitchell Santner, who took 13 wickets against India in Pune on his last Test appearance, is on for Southee.
Stokes makes a pretty unambiguous statement of intent by pinging a reverse sweep for four off the first ball. That also brings up an impressively assured fifty partnership from 74 balls.
A partnership, alas, that comes to an abrupt end four balls later when Pope is surprised by some extra bounce and jabs to slip. It was good bowling rather than a poor shot, although Pope’s wrists were on the stiff side. Whatever the reason, England are in doodoo country.
